im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
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