you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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