She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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