okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
