doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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