TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
