I'm lost and stupid without you.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I licked your asshole in confidence.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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