South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
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