Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
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