If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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