I wish I could punch you in the face.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
