Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
Well my cheeks are red now
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
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Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
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I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you