I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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