just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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