Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
You left your phone here
Wait...
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