just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
