And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
