Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
