margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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