Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
