Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
