No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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