he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
