Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize