So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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