She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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