why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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