i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
