Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize