Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
