Kareoke will never be a sober sport
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
