then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
