Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
