My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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