would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Randomize