It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
