so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
