fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Buhtt sex?
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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