she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
