I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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