you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
