i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
