just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I don't think brook has ever known best
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
