susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
