I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
You can't special order awesome
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
