I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
She bit a glass in half.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
