How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
