Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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