just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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