Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
