nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize